Casket For Sale (Only Used Once) (Andrew Mayhem Chronicles) on Amazon™

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Casket For Sale (Only Used Once) (Andrew Mayhem Chronicles)

Regular Price: $12.00 |

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Customer Review

Highly recommended for totally sick people.
Andrew Mayhem has had trouble finding a steady job. Let's face it, with Andrew's track record of killing people (in self defense, of course) getting hired is not easy. And anyone in close proximity to Andrew always ends up having his awful luck spill over onto him. But Andrew is really trying to be a responsible adult. He has two kids and a pregnant wife to consider. So no more accepting jobs in a bar from beautiful women offering him lots of money or jobs that pays big money for one night of work. Things are looking up for Andrew.His best friend, Roger Tanglen, seems to be having better luck too. Roger now has a gorgeous blond girlfriend named Samantha. Andrew cannot help but feel threatened by Samantha though. Andrew was in short supply of friends and he feared Samantha might take Roger away. So Helen, Andrew's wife, decides they all need take a vacation for a short while.Andrew rents a camper (pays extra for insurance too since he is now being responsible)...
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June 5, 2005 (USA) | Helpful Votes: 5 | Rating: 5

Strand just keeps getting better
Andrew Mayhem seems to have learned his lesson. He has stopped taking money from strange women in coffee shops to do vague odd jobs, has resolved to be more responsible, and has even gotten a (gasp!) real job. After the adventures chronicled in his previous two books (Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary) and Single White Psychopath Seeks Same), a vacation is in order, but he just cannot seem to stay out of trouble. That is unlucky for him, but lucky for us, because Jeff Strand's Casket for Sale (Only Used Once) is another terrific blend of humor and horror.This time the trouble is not really Andrew's fault, however. With his wife Helen, and their two children Kyle and Theresa, along with Andrew's friend Roger and his new girlfriend Samantha (who Andrew despises, though he doesn't know why) along, he made sure the camper's gas tank was full, and he even heeded the mysterious warning from the old man at the "Last Chance 4 Gas" station ("I want to check the...
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October 14, 2006 (New England) | Helpful Votes: 3 | Rating: 5

Product Description

Meet the new, improved Andrew Mayhem. He has a real job. He's a better father and husband. And he's vowed to quit accepting money from strange women in coffee shops to perform tasks that go terribly, terribly wrong. This time he's just taking a relaxing camping trip with his family and best friend. No shortcuts. The gas tank is full. The sinister warning of the crazy old man is taken seriously. Unfortunately, when you're Andrew Mayhem, you just can't help being attacked by a group of savage killers bent on inflicting ghastly torture and bringing horrific death. Relentlessly pursued through a booby-trapped forest, it's one crisis after another as Andrew fights to protect his family, loses a body part or two, and faces the single darkest moment of his entire life. Top to learn more

A nutty and disturbing read for odd folks
I read this without having first read any of the previous books in the series and particularly liked the fact that the author didn't bore me to death with back story and managed to allude to his past adventures in a snidely funny way.This was one wacky book. Something about the writing reminded me of Joe Landsale who also successfully mixes humor and atrocity. I had been warned that this book wasn't quite as disturbing as the previous books so I was quite shocked at some of the violent turns this book took! I can only imagine what happened in the previous books and now I have to find them ;)As I was reading, I could almost see the writer with a mad smile on his face, gleefully rubbing his hands together, while he plotted one over-the-top scene after another. I enjoyed this book a lot even when I thought some of the plot turns were quite ridiculous.
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June 22, 2006 (USA) | Helpful Votes: 7 | Rating: 4

Homage , Bronze

Price with discount: $1,495.00 | You Save: $600.00 (40%)

Product Details

Male
18 guage steel
Bronze shaded with ebony
Masculine

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Product Description

Bronze shaded Ebony finish Beige velvet interior. Full size , Beige velvet interior, 18 ga. steel, hinged handles, Includes pillow, includes adjustable bed height. Fully sealed with rubber gasket. Locking mechanism. Includes memory tube. Top to learn more

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Casket of Souls

Regular Price: ~~$7.99~~ | Price with discount: $7.99 |

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Sale Price: $7.99

Product Description

The Nightrunners are back in this gripping novel full of Lynn Flewelling’s trademark action, intrigue, and richly imagined characters.

More than the dissolute noblemen they appear to be, Alec and Seregil are skillful spies, dedicated to serving queen and country. But when they stumble across evidence of a plot pitting Queen Phoria against Princess Klia, the two Nightrunners will find their loyalties torn as never before. Even at the best of times, the royal court at Rhíminee is a serpents’ nest of intrigue, but with the war against Plenimar going badly, treason simmers just below the surface.

And that’s not all that poses a threat: A mysterious plague is spreading through the crowded streets of the city, striking young and old alike. Now, as panic mounts and the body count rises, hidden secrets emerge. And as Seregil and Alec are about to learn, conspiracies and plagues have one thing in common: The cure can be as deadly as the disease.

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Cardboard Casket - The Artist's Paper Craft Coffin (White Color)

Price with discount: $250.00 |

Product Details

Draw, Paint or Attach art, messages, flowers, photos & more to honor your loved one.
Maximum Weight Capacity: 500 lbs.
Completely Biodegradable with No toxic glues or metal parts.
Perfect for Natural Burial, Green Burial, Home Funeral and Cremation
Internal Size: 6'2'' length (188 cm) x 24 inches (61 cm)

Product Description

Environmentally friendly and affordable, this casket is suitable for Natural Burials or Cremations. Extremely durable (weight partitions capable of handling up to 500 pounds). Post-consumer cardboard is Completely Green - no toxic glues or metal parts. The lid is designed with a secure locking tab. Saying goodbye to someone you love by decorating their coffin is a way to lovingly share final messages and deal with your own grief. Your own designs also beautify these eco friendly coffins in a way no other coffins or caskets allow. Ask family and friends to draw, paint or attach art, messages, flowers, photos and more to honor your loved one and to say goodbye individually. Top to learn more

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Pet Casket Eternal Rest Affordable Family Dog Casket Large Cat Casket Large Bird Casket {Pet Casket Size= 24"L x 12"W x 10"H } Color= Medium Oak. $ 50.00 Deluxe Lace Coverlet & Pillow Included

Regular Price: ~~$259.95~~ | Price with discount: $173.00 | You Save: $86.95 (33%)

Product Details

Deluxe lace coverlet & pillow included.
MADE IN USA. Premium double wall construction with self sealing lid.
Affordable, yet traditional way to lay your beloved friend or family member to rest.
Premium pet caskets,crafted from strong, durable polyurethane.
Member ICCFA.

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Customer Review

quality product made in USA
These caskets are by far the best made I have seen. I realize this is kind of a morbid post,but I beleive in traditional burial & of all the caskets I have looked at,this is the best constructed & will last forever.
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September 14, 2011 | Helpful Votes: 2 | Rating: 5

Product Description

Pet Casket,Dog Casket,Large Cat Casket,Large Bird Casket,Animal Casket. The Eternal Rest Pet Casket is an affordable,yet traditional way to lay your beloved pet & family member to rest. Combining the look of a natural wood grain finish with the strength and durability of rigid polyurethane. This pet casket is made from non-deteriorating, rigid polyurethane with thick-walled high-impact construction, which is water resistant and able to withstand pressure exceeding 360 pounds per square inch. Designed to look like an authentic wood finish, the casket restricts intrusion of air and has a water-tight seal, a casket vault is not necessary. Friction-fit lid attaches with adhesive tape. This pet casket is appropriate for earth burial only.Our pet caskets are approved for use in most pet cemeteries and are suitable for backyard pet burial. This pet casket is available in medium oak, silver-grey or white faux wood in a variety of sizes. For a more formal interior, the Deluxe Liner is a lovingly hand-sewn fine crepe fabric trimmed in lace. Usually available as an accessory, WE INCLUDE this hand crafted egg shell coverlet, consisting of a soft, cushioned center encircled by a fine crepe fabric. The cushion lays snugly in the casket and the attached liner is generously gathered to create a coverlet. Both the coverlet and accompanying pillow are trimmed in a delicate white lace. Important Sizing Note Since every pet is unique, we always encourage using the supplied chart as reference only. We encourage owners to get the dimensions of their pet to help ensure the correct size. When making the decision between two sizes, we encourage the use of the larger casket. This helps to make sure the correct casket is purchased the first time, eliminating the need for a second order. Top to learn more

BUY Pet Casket Eternal Rest Affordable Family Dog Casket Large Cat Casket Large Bird Casket {Pet Casket Size= 24"L x 12"W x 10"H } Color= Medium Oak. $ 50.00 Deluxe Lace Coverlet & Pillow Included

Accolade, Antique White

Price with discount: $1,495.00 | You Save: $540.00 (36%)

Product Details

Includes pillow
Pink crepe interior
18 gauge

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Product Description

Antique white finish Pink crepe interior 18 gauge Steel. Includes pillow. Locking mechanism, memory tube. Adjustable height bed. Top to learn more

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And he also kept his promise to buy the dead friend a “brand new” casket. Long ago, the two promised each other that whoever died first would have his casket bought by the other. violate or infringe the rights of any person, are defamatory or harassing or include personal attacks are abusive, profane or offensive contain material which violates or encourages others to violate any applicable law promote hatred of any kind...

They then have transport to the funeral home that’s needed to accept the casket, whatever state the funeral is in. Look for a funeral parlor that is aware of your budget limitations and you’re simply not thinking about getting their caskets. In order to get a lower price casket, it will likely be inexpensive to order from an internet casket vendor instead of through the funeral parlor. Some states have you get a casket from a certified funeral home and in these states the price for caskets are also greater. Wood and bronze caskets are actually more costly than the rolled shiny steel gauge caskets. Funeral parlor often have various funeral packages, which include a casket, depending on how much cash you can pay for a funeral. Speak with family members or legal counsel to determine if your relative set aside cash in advance for burial arrangements, or if members of the family can help share the cash responsibility of obtaining a casket and memorial service bills. Passing of life normally will happen all of a sudden, and the majority people find it difficult to find right caskets for their family. Metal gauge caskets are among the hottest used in the latest funerals because of their economical price and detailed styles.

I don’t see why a cat couldn’t be and I fully expect one of mine to show up when it’s time for me to go. While this has no immediate bearing on the subject did you know you can actually rent a casket for your deceased and honestly maybe you don’t... Oh and you can buy caskets from Costco now apparently and for much less than a funeral home. I’ll read nearly anything but I very much enjoy horror and fantasy (and science fiction of course) and psychopomps figure heavily in some of the recent fiction I’ve read. I think Death in Terry Pratchet’s Discworld is THE Death, but also a guide for those poor confused souls who get lost shuffling off the coil of Ankh Morepork. I actually just heard about the sparrow being a psychopomp (I believe the term my friend used was “death guide” but it’s the same thing) because one committed suicide in the grill of my car. If you saw The Crow (and as a former card carrying goth, of course I did, several times) then you know both the Brandon Lee character and his actual crow are psychopomps. While I was thinking about this entry I came across a website I’ll be spending more time on The Order of the Good Death , in which the web mistress fashions herself a psychopomp.

Funeral homes are prohibited from requiring consumers to buy a casket or any other product as a condition of obtaining any other funeral good or service. They must also provide a list of casket prices before consumers view any caskets. The funeral homes found to have significant violations can enter the Funeral Rule Offenders Program (FROP), a training program designed to increase compliance with the Funeral Rule. Among other items, the Funeral Rule requires funeral homes to provide consumers with an itemized price list at the start of an in-person discussion of funeral arrangements.

Casket News

Craftsman's work outlives his customers

But a funeral provider cannot refuse to handle a casket or urn purchased elsewhere — or charge you a fee to do so, according to the Federal Trade Commission. Nevertheless, most consumers in Kentucky choose to buy caskets through funeral homes,
Green Burials Help the Earth and Your Pocketbook

No longer do we need to be shackled to the traditional Christian burial process of embalming, placing in a air-tight elaborate casket and entombing the casket in a concrete vault. A green burial is, as you might expect, a much less elaborate affair.
13 Things the Funeral Director Won't Tell You

3. You can buy caskets that are just as nice as the ones in my showroom for thousands of dollars less online from Walmart, Costco, or straight from a manufacturer. 4. On a budget or concerned about the environment? Consider a rental casket.